"LOVE" in my life

A friend inspired me to write about LOVE in my life.. (by LOVE I only mean loving someone from the opposite sex.. I'm not talking about loving my parents, loving my nephew, etc.. and before you come to any conclusions, let me also tell you that I'm straight..) So it all started with me first wanting to tell my story to her.. I wanted to write a small write-up, which as per my habit became pretty long.. Apparently yesterday, August 11th, was Romance Day so today she asked me blog this story because it represents such an ironic view about love... (can't understand if that's a compliment or just a remark..) neway here goes, my story, forever to get lost in the huge WWW (world wide web) of information..

I have almost always grown up with friends.. and today when I look back, I see I have a lot of friends, really good friends.. and they include quite a few girls as well, even though i behaved like an ascetic, until only recently... and I am not related to any of these girls, except three of them, through the word "LOVE", that's if it exists at all... these four girls have literally carved the way i feel about girls... they changed the way i look at infactuation, love and friendship...

lets call them I (i loved her), S (she loved me), F (its all a fake).. of the three, i only met F in person a couple of times.. with I and S, our relationship has been mainly through the net...

Soon after coming to IIT, i met I (i met her in person only the first time, after that it was always online)... it was not love at first sight, because i think you only make-believe yourselves to fall in love at first sight when the girl looks like an angel.. and I was nowhere near that.. she was just average, but definitely better-looking than me... however with time, as i started speaking to her more, i realised she was like the "kohinoor diamond among all girls" for me.. her life seemed like a mirror image of mine.. her thoughts matched mine, n i totally understood her, or so i thought.. i enjoyed my time with her... every moment I was with her I seemed to be happy.. so happy, that I didn't want to be away from her anymore.. I was putting off all my work to be with her.. i was wasting my life to be with her.. and i certainly couldn't imagine my life without her.. so one day i finally decided that i could not let things go this way anymore, and so told I that she was becoming very special to me.. she said its just a crush, but i told her it was much more than that.. she told me "we are just good friends and we can stay that way.. you will get over me.. I can help you with that".. at that instant I told her, "i will never get over you.. i will love you forever.. but yea, we can stay as just friends".. i really felt she thought the way she did, because of watching those stupid, romantic SRK movies, which make you believe that one fine morning a knight would come riding on a shiny metallic black Pulsar and then everyone lives happily ever after... but deep down i felt that maybe she was right... so i tried getting over her... how? i tried to start hating her... then i started hating all girls in general, as a principle... but i soon realised that still deeper down, i could never hate her... she really was the best and i would always feel the same about her...

i even justified my ideas thinking she felt the same towards me as i felt towards her... afterall, every moment i spent with her, she was spending it with me too... so were we just good friends? i don't want to believe so.. even though superficially we are just friends today, deep down i still feel the same towards her.. but is this LOVE? or is it just respect for someone i look up to so much? does the kind of love shown in romantic-SRK-movies really exist? its hard to tell...

While all this was going on, I found an old school mate of mine, S, thanks to Orkut... i told S everything about me and I, and she always used to hear me patiently... i always took her for granted, and it would probably have been impossible for me to handle my break-up with I if S wasn't with me... she was always there with me in my most dispirited times... but only recently did i put two and two together, and realised that S had a crush on me right from the start... she always wants to be with me, she looks up to me, she makes me feel important as if i were a king, and would do anything for me... though she hasn't revealed her feelings for me yet, i don't want to raise any false hopes in her... so i'm now slowly but consciously drifting away from her... why?? maybe because i'm still not over I, or maybe because she is not the life-partner i had envisaged... i wanted my wife to be beautiful, and so on... and S didn't even come close to matching the "qualifications"... this also puts me more or less in the same situation as my break up with I... only this time, i am being I and S is being me... we are "just friends" according to me, but much more than that for her... coming to think of it, is it better to marry someone who matches your "qualifications" or someone who would love you eternally... the latter is obvious correct choice, but its not the decision we always take, and so didn't I...

A little after my break up with I, I started feeling that maybe I was just being too orthodox about this whole issue of girls and love, probably because I had barely spoken to girls until college... and soon I came in contact with another old school mate, F... she had turned into this hot, sexy chick since the last time i had seen her and was studying in the hottest college in the whole city of Mumbai... every boy's DREAM GIRL... I realised she was my best chance to break out of my shell of shyness... my target was to become friends with her, friends in the modern way... u understand right, friends in the modern open way who have "fun" together... she was this completely i-wanna-party kinda girl... and seemed to flirt with you every time she spoke... it seemed exciting to be with her at first, but then maybe i'm just not open to modernisation... i soon got tired of her, so soon that i didnt even have any fun with her ;) ... i did go meet her twice, but got fed up of her spontaneous yet obvious lies after that... so i crawled back into my shell again but every now and then i would get the sudden burst of energy to turn the wheel of change again.. but everytime i called her up she would say she was out with a friend, and then i would hang up... she never even cared to call back, afterall she was having fun even without me...

will continue later sometime..

World "this" Day, International "that" Day

Apparently yesterday was Romance Day. Really, one of my friends told me so. Now, why do we need a Romance Day when we already have a Valentines Day... I don't know... but that not forbid us from imagining a reason.

You see, there is a secret society working round the clock marking the importance of each day for the betterment of this world. They are the secret saviors of mankind and they are saving humans from the existing chaos. Their huge plan is to create a system of days which when followed would bring order into this world. This is how a typical year for them reads:

(I have a feeling the plan is only for men, so while reading the blog just assume that you are male. And honestly, I have not made up any day, they all exist. For that matter, many more exist but I didn't have the patience to include them all.)
Start the year by remembering the Holocaust victims on Jan 27th: International Holocaust Remembrance Day. Then celebrate the International Mother Language Day on 21st Feb. In the meantime drink, fag, dope, go out with girls, keep flirting and dating. On Feb 14th: Valentine's Day propose to the girl(s) and have ultimate fun ;) Tell her (them) that you respect women and celebrate the International Women's Day on 8th March. Get her some water to drink on May 22nd: World Water Day and take her to a movie on March 27th: World Theatre Day. On April 1st, make a fool of her (and in the process of yourself). Go for a health checkup on April 7th: World Health Day. You get your results on April 22nd: Earth Day, and Earth seems like a wonderful place because the doc just told you were gonna be "Papa" soon. If you feel like dancing, then you have the International Dance Day on April 29th. Be with your family on May 15th: International Day of Families and celebrate Mother's Day on second Sunday of May (if you live in India) and Father's Day on third Sunday of June (in India). Plan for a good society for your child to grow up in on May 17th: World International Society Day.

Buy your kid (or would-be baby) a pet on May 22nd: International Day for Biological Diversity and quit smoking from May 31st: World No-Tobacco Day. Care for the environment on June 5th: World Environment Day and do some public service on June 23rd: UN Public Service Day. For some (like me) it could also mean go do some work for the company that's been paying you. Now, its time to quit dope on June 26th: International Day Against Drug Abuse & Illicit Trafficking. Decide once again if you want to increase the world's population by July 11th: World Population Day. If you decided to have the kid, then you have a right to celebrate on Aug 9th: International Day of the World's Indigenous People. August 23rd is the International Day for the Remembrance of the Slave Trade and its Abolition. But when was Slavery Abolished?? The previous year on Dec 2nd: International Day for the Abolition of Slavery. Celebrate Teacher's Day on Sep 5th (if you are in India) or on Oct 5th: World Teacher's Day. Care for older people on Oct 1st: International Day for Older Persons and don't forget to post a letter on Oct 9th: World Post Day.

On Nov 14th: Children's Day, exactly 9 months after your made out with your wife.. (I don't care about when was the last time with your other girls), you get your baby. But don't worry if you missed your deadline, you are given another chance on Nov 20th: Universal Children's Day. Nov 10th: World Science Day for Peace and Development is the last peaceful day for this year. Now starts struggle. But tolerate, because Nov 16th is International Day for Tolerance. You might want to push your wife under some truck, but DON'T. Nov 18th is the World Day of Remembrance for Road Traffic Victims. While you are watching TV on Nov 21st: World Television Day, you might instead want to break that TV on your wife's head. But how can you, Nov 25th is the International Day for the Elimination of Violence against Women.

Now you don't even want to remember all the fun you used to have earlier in the year, because you have been tested positive for AIDS on Dec 1st: World AIDS Day. Remember the abolition of slavery we spoke about earlier, it comes in now. You feel like a slave for your wife and feel handicapped. Hence, you take up a march on Dec 2nd: International Day for teh Abolition of Slavery and Dec 3rd: International Day for Disabled Persons. You fight for your Human Rights on Dec 10th: Human Rights Day. You feel like jumping off a mountain on Dec 11th: International Mountain Day. But you don't. Instead, you bribe a someone at the airport to dump you in a plane along with the cargo and you fly (run) away in a cargo plane on Dec 7th: International Civil Aviation Day. You have no regrets on Dec 9th: International Anti-Corruption Day, instead you celebrate the International Migrants Day on Dec 18th.

On Dec 19th, you celebrate UN Day for South-South Cooperation. Wait, whats South-south cooperation? Maybe south means bottom. Ahh, here is a clue. Dec 20th is Identical Human Solidarity Day. HMMMMM... does that mean you have now turned gay?? It's getting too vulgar, I better stop here.

So what next?? Thank my "Beautiful Mind" for its wonderful imagination. And let me end with what I had started. So, yesterday was Romance Day and on this day, August 12th 30BC, Cleopatra committed suicide. Sad.

Finding the quickest lane on Hyderabad's roads

Roads are demarcated into lanes.. In India, protocol is, the lanes are progressively faster towards the right.. Hyderabad however is an exception.. I bet even Rossi wouldn't be able to beat any Hyderabadi, partly due to the traffic and partly due to the lack of rules.. but having traveled over 700km in the past 4 weeks, I realised Hyderabadi traffic isn't as chaotic as made out to be by the media and outsiders.. the reality is that we do follow rules, the catch being, we make our own rules and then follow them..

In Hyderabad, just as everywhere else, there are two extremes of drivers..
1) the first kind will not change the lane.. by Darwin's theory of "Survival of the Fittest", they have realised that they are safest on the right-most lane.. hence, however fast or slow they may be driving, they will not change the lane.. the best examples of this species would be the RTC buses and the tempo-long autos with trailers.. they generally wouldn't be troubling you if you ride outside their lane..
2) the second kind are those that cannot stick to a lane for more than 50m.. even at midnight when all roads are empty, you can see them shifting lanes.. this species is rare and generally consists of bikers on shiny, new Pulsars, Apaches and now the R15s.. you don't have to worry about them in traffic either because they go as fast as they come.. just hold your line and speed, and trust HIM (HIM not referring to God, but to the other biker.. just believe that he knows how to ride his bike, because over half the times he does.. only rest of the times, its his meaner and younger brother who is still learning..)

Anyway, coming back.. Riding on the fastest lane in Hyderabad does not imply you are the quickest.. you are just lost in the traffic.. but in the midst of all this chaotic driving, you find that there is an underlying order to it.. so to ride safely and reach your destination faster, all you need to do is to follow the following tips ;) :

1) RULE No. 1: DO NOT FOLLOW THE RULES.. as far as possible "follow their opposite".. I am not kidding, its true.. everyone likes to travel on the fastest lane, so much so that its no more the fastest.. this also leads to overtaking maneuvers from the left, because there is no place left to the right.. you find that the left-most lane is left empty while everyone is battling it out on the faster lanes.. just take the leftmost lane and you can sometimes even reach upto 70kmph and easily beat out the traffic.. try it sometime.. Trying out the above tip might be difficult since long, straight, wide roads are scarce in Hyderabad, except in Jubilee Hills and Madhapur area.. but you try something similar in any turn.. the whole traffic is concentrated near the bend that if you take the longest curve, you can easily beat the entire traffic.. besides, you can also go faster, and bend more on your bike, thus giving you more riding pleasure..

2) RULE No. 2: Try to avoid the traffic.. you will find that there is a lot of unused road-space.. at many a bottle-neck region (such as at almost every turn), the problem is not that the road is getting thinner but that all the vehicles were simply cramming themselves into only a fraction of the road.. I will give you a real life scenario.. a car-driver on the right-most lane has to turn left.. he even has the indicator ON, but the biker behind him wants to overtake him.. as is the norm in Hyderabad, you need to overtake from the left.. so the biker cuts across all the lanes along with the car and almost ends up taking the left-turn himself before finally managing to get past the car.. along the process, the car-driver is confused which direction the biker would like to take and for the traffic behind, they all cram themselves into the left-most lane.. only few of the drivers take the lane just cleared by the car, and enjoy the long stretch of empty road.. try it sometime - you will find that such hiccups will also lead to empty lanes on the left, a little ahead..

And remember, there is no alternative to practising slalom racing..

Faster does not necessarily mean quicker

Last friday, somebody told me a story.. It was about 2 drivers, Ram and Kishan.. both of them were excellent drivers.. Ram could take you from location A to location B in only 2hr 30min as compared to the 3hr taken by everyone else.. while he achieved this feat, he also made you regain the faith in God.. Kishan however would drive far more smoothly and guess what, he would take only 2hr 15min.. there was no moral to the story so I made one -- "Faster does not necessarily mean quicker."

For the first two-three weeks after joining Deloitte, I used to come to the office on (my brother-in-law's) Yamaha RX 135.. For those who haven't ridden it, its a wonderful bike.. awesome acceleration, exceptionally light and agile.. (its so light, that even a Super Splendour seems heavy compared to it..) later I took my Unicorn.. it was like a truck compared to the Yamaha.. and the acceleration was lower as well.. besides that, I was asked not to ride faster than 40 (although I did about 60) and not to rev the engine too much, not to accelerate or brake too hard and not to do that and not to do this.. basically to drive it as smoothly as I possibly could.. I used to take 35min to reach office (about 18km) everyday on the Yamaha and on the Unicorn, "You guessed it!!" I still took only 35min, maybe a minute more or less.. the moral of the story? "Faster does not necessarily mean quicker. You have got to maintain that speed."

the fact was that, on the Yamaha, I was decelerating as much as I was accelerating.. It gave me more pleasure riding it, but I wasn't gaining any time.. because I was concentrated more on squeezing between the traffic.. but on the Unicorn, even though I was definitely slower, I was maintaining a constant speed for much longer times because I was trying to make it a smoother ride.. How to find that quicker (not faster) lane on Hyderabad's roads - I will discuss in the next blog..

Getz Vs City

Its early Tuesday morning. It had rained a little yesterday night.. The night was cold but not chilly... And morning everything seemed normal.. another perfect day.. Nothing seemed to have changed from yesterday..
Its a working day, so I had to go to work.. I thought I would get ready early, but I was late nevertheless.. My Unicorn's insurance papers were not yet done, so I had to take my Yamaha RX 135 to work instead.. (as much as I love the Yamaha.. I would have loved to ride the Unicorn today.. first long trip on the Unicorn since I bought it last Saturday)

It was around 9am and I was near KBR park.. cutting across the traffic to reach office quicker, or should I say to reduce the amount of time I was going to be delayed.. there was enough office-going traffic on the roads to negate the fact that the roads near the KBR park are some of the widest in hyderabad (if i remember correct, its a 4-lane road).. everyone is moving at a speed of not more than 30 (except ofcourse the bikers who make their own zig-zag lanes at 60 kmph). On my way to the office, I saw a Hyundai Getz.. The only thing that was not normal about it was that it had wider tyres.. it had been modified.. Other than that it seemed like just another Getz.. But soon he unleashed the power in it, and Vrooooom... WHAT ACCELERATION!! But even more, WHAT A DRIVER!! Here was a driver, who was on the left-most lane, overtaking a bus (from the left, as is the mutually understood norm in Hyderabad) and then immediately cuts across all the lanes and overtakes an auto (from the right this time).. He then overtakes the Honda City in front, and then cuts left but decides mid-way to stay in the lane coz the traffic signal was still red.. If you remember Stella Bredger's (played by Charlize Theron) entrance in the movie The Italian Job (the remake made in 2003), you shouldn't have much difficulty visualizing what I'm saying.. The way she drives her Mini Cooper cuttinjg across lanes made us (atleast me) look at the silver screen with a feeling of awe, especially coz the camera was mounted on a Helicopter and the aerial view looked terrific.. But the driving I saw today was no less amazing..

Now, here is what I believe (atleast till today)... At a traffic signal, the bikes have an advantage over the cars.. the cars, for sure, have more power by all stats but the bikes easily beat them.. only when you have a long enough roam can the cars catch up.. and when it comes to bikes, the 2-stroke bikes easily beat the 4-stroke engined bikes for the first 100-200m.. And of all the 2-stroke bikes, none are better remembered than the Yamaha RX 100 and RX135 for their sheer acceleration through the first 2 gears..

so back to my story.. I was at the signal, behind the Getz and the City.. I was pretty sure I could beat them both easily.. The signal turned green.. A few bikes in the front raced away and the cars, buses and autos were slowly accelerating onto the clear stretch of road.. The moment he got a little bit of space in front of him, the Getz driver took off... For a few metres it seemed like I could overtake him if I had a little more space, but after that I gave-up that hope.. One, I was unable to match his acceleration and deceleration, and two, he was just far too quick in manouvering and rash for me to chase him..

He accelerated to 20, cut left, accelerated to , cut left again, overtook the vehicle in front and then cut right, overtake 2 vehicles - one on either side, and cut right again.. braked hard almost down to a halt.. accelerated again, cut left 2 lanes at one go and brakes again very hard.. what a scene.. i was literally dumbstruck by his driving.. what kind of an idiot would drive so rashly, especially on the roads of Hyderabad (which is famous for having some of the most reckless drivers).. or maybe he was one of the drivers that made Hyderabadi traffic famous (or infamous)..

Just visualise the way the Getz driver was driving and now imagine what it would have been to see two such cars racing on the road.. Yes, TWO.. the City was chasing the Getz this time.. At first, I thought the City driver was trying to maintain with the Getz so that he could cut through traffic easily, but he was racing with him.. for an automobile freak like me, that was pure bliss.. but for the others driving on that road, I bet they wanted to park their vehicles to the side.. i tried to chase the 2 cars (just for the fun of it), but i could clearly see them getting away (even through all that traffic).. having followed Formula 1 for the past 4 yrs or so, I know that much depends on the driver, but much more depends on the car.. only now am I beginning to comprehend how powerful these latest generation cars are.. and if this is the case with a Honda City, what about the BMWs and the Porsches.. and then what about the Bugatti Veyron.. NO COMMENTS!!